Brain poop

   Last night when I finally got into bed, as I laid there in the bliss of my bed, it slowly came to my awareness how dam tired I was. I then realized how achy my legs were. Slowly my awareness blossomed into my toes even hurt and gosh my elbow is starting!. Within a few moments my entire body became a wildfire of aches, so much so I had to turn over to try to find relief. After a few minutes of this I caught myself with these observances and quickly focused on my breathing, inhale and exhale. Within minutes the body pain returned to mildly aching

legs and that was all. Interesting how once my mind noticed one thing it quickly searched out and created more of what I was observing. This is what our brains are so well equipped to do. Find more of what we need at the time.
   I think back in our past when we were on the plains, deserts and jungles our brains knew when we were looking for food to be very aware and when we did find food to notice quickly more of it. When we found berries, our brains could spot it very quickly therefore producing more of what we needed. The problem is today we grocery shop, have no predators after us, our daily needs are met and that part of our brain is not needed like it once was. That part of our brain feels obsolete and so today it focuses on what we focus on. So when we focus on sadness our brains will search to find more things to keep us sad. If we focus on anger and what someone did to us, our brains will quickly come up with more bad stuff that person did to us. In fact our brains remember bad stuff much more than good things.
   Have you ever noticed how many horrible thoughts you can have about certain people but find it difficult to search through the memory banks to find even 2 good things. That’s because the brain is designed for survival and that means paying more attention to bad than good. Our brains still are in the plains, deserts and jungles but our bodies are living in modern cities and towns with food everywhere, minimal danger threats and our basic needs met daily. Thousands of years that our brains have been keeping us alive it is hard to drop this and develop a new way, a better way. This is why there will be wars, killing and other violence until each individual recognizes what their brain is capable of and decides to do differently.
   Mindfulness and meditation have taught me what my mind is capable of. I have seen the illusions it creates to make me believe something is true. I have seen the great lengths it will go to trying to disturb the peace. It thinks it is my friend when in reality most times it becomes my enemy. Meditation is the cage I have built for it. When my mind begins its usual hunt for bad I throw it in the meditation box and it quiets down. Even right now I instantly noticed a breath and my mind quit! It works but only with practice and patience.
   I can’t  even describe how wonderful things are these days compared to many years ago. Having endless nights, awake worrying or contemplating. Having endless days of anger, frustration and worry. Having fleeting moments of joy only to be taken by my mind to a distant place of anger or sadness.
   My mind is quiet and can be quieted quickly when I need it quiet. I have control over it and it knows it.

Love to you


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